Call them whatever you want but breasts will always be breasts no matter what they look like, their shapes & sizes...
I however named my pair "my-greatest-liabilities" whilst ex-lovers call them "greatest-assets".
Trust me... they're so not an assets!
Having large breasts has been a total curse for me. I grew up with total shame over my body and never felt confident. I have struggled with stares, comments and attitudes. To me, it's like; you can see my twins from Orbit.
Having mega-huge breasts does not automatically make you feel beautiful either. That is something that all of us have to struggle with, and having our problems heard through a documentary or complaining is a way to come to terms with our body shape whether it is with big breasts or small ones.
I asked my doctor why I looked like a grandma, he was laughing out loud (while I was crying) and showed me a book filled with photos of different kind of breasts... he said it's not because of the wrong usage of bra types or because I didn't take good care of them but because of human breasts came in different shapes and sizes... he said it's not even sagging. They were just plain heavy & he said I have nothing to worry about because I can still wear tons of different types of bra available in stores that will flaunt my self-proclaimed-liabilities... I can't fight nature’s will, he said (may I remind you that I was only 16 then?? owh yeah and I was pregnant too. My first bra was worn at the age of 16.. so hell yeah.. I am a late bloomer... boohoo..)
As years gone by, I've endured some truly appalling pickup lines. I've had women & drag queens asking me “Are those real?” before asking for my name. That is just shitty-fuckin’-crap but I have to go thru all this shitty crap, unlike any of you...
And the boys??? The cheeky men? All those perverts?? Urrgghhhhh... need I say more? Well, Men are gonna look and look and looking at them like nobody's business! Not only is it gonna be one of them cool gazes, but a comical full on orchestrated STARE with cheeky smiles & twitching eyebrows.
Do you know what it is like having a man speaks to you but never look at your face but your chest every now and then?
I've been molested-for-fun, a lot as well. Mostly by people (or should I more specific?? My own friends) who think caressing my jugs up is hilarious and “ironic” and not at all inappropriate or abusive.
It is seriously annoying when people kept on staring at them EVEN when I am wearing baju kurung or T-shirts or some loose over-sized-blouses... I still can't hide these pair... trust me, I am not proud of these but they were given to me by Allah SWT... I`ve had a love/hate relationships with my breasts my whole entire life. It took me a long time to accept them and loves them so I flaunt them 'coz I can't get rid of them easily..
I seriously hates it when older women (wearing Hijab especially) starts staring then whispering to the person next to them and they will all look at me while their lips annoyingly trying hard to kill me softly.
So, normally, I'd finger-fucked them to their stupid ugly faces. Occasionally I'd make a horny face and starts fondling my boobs while staring back at them but all I know is by simply pointing out that my breasts are large is not inherently hilarious to me either. So fuck them women!!
People could be very cruel and harsh most of the time too. They make stupid jokes about them but knowing me, I will gave my bullet-proof-poker-face to smile along when truth is, it hurts.. It does hurt badly because I’ve always believed that every stupid joke has an element of truth to it....
So my dearest friends and haters, I honestly want you to know that it is so fucking insulting when you guys are making fun of my boobs.
It's not like I paid my surgeon to add in my bra size. I was as surprised to see them growing out like these. Go ask my family members. I grew up under their roof (none of them make fun of me because they know, GOD gave me these. I don’t ask him for these... Will never ever ask for an inch bigger)
So even when somebody says “Don't take it seriously ok? I was just kidding!” after a mean comment, there had to be something they believed about the remark as a reference point. Teasing never just came totally out of the blue.
Still I think it is not fair for people to say shits like "sayangnya dia langsung tak menjaga aset dia yang paling penting" (this was said to a model in FB where I added a comment too, earlier on)
People loved to judge and being so cruel about a lot of things that they themselves never had to face or experience.
I am also aware that some people are just mean to others because it makes them feels better..
You don't know what it's like to have these heavy melons attached to your body 24 hours a day, 365 days til' the day you die...
Have you ever picture yourself having these pairs at the age of 16 til' now??? Berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul deerrrr... come and ask my shoulder personally, they'll tell you inside out (if only they could speak, that is)
When I was younger, kids in school make fun of me almost everyday (I attended an all-girls-school) and it’s worst when I have to crossed the neighbouring school (the all-boys school that i hated so much).
So every morning after each shower, looking at myself at the full-figure mirror with my granny-melons, I prayed "Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku please give me breast cancer, ASAP" (so I could have a smaller melons) but now, I am thankful for what my admirers call, "my-precious-assets" (I still call 'em liabilities tho).
I am grateful Allah didn't answer my daily prayer.. Alhamdullillah, Ya Allah... I am thankful...
Then again, all women have issues. So, mine wasn't really an issue after-all...
I will have to accept the gift of GOD and I will grow old gracefully no matter what that annoying salesgirl’s said to me like "try this cream, Miss. You will have more firm breasts" each time I am at the mall where there will be a magic-beauty-kiosk thingy where everyone could be pretty damn hot after purchasing their beauty products.
You guys out there will have to accept the fact that I have a have huge knockers. I am NOT gonna hide them or over-exposing them. Therefore I have no reason to be insecure because I am a real stunner and there is nothing sexier in the whole world than a woman who believes she's sexy! (hah.. ko hadooorrr? sexy kerrrrrr? her her her.. )
And as far as people mocking me, I will just think about this. People only tease other people because of the reactions they get. No reaction, no fun, right? I am enjoying the attention, so bring it on, HATERS!!
My advice to you? PLEASE BE Sweet and nice to others. Treat those around you with kindness & give them the benefit of the doubt. Try to put yourself in their shoes & imagine yourself in others circumstances & act respectfully instead of insulting and mocking (especially if you want to sell or introduce a new beauty products... hahahha)
Always remember to look before you leap and keep your words as sweet and as tender as possible because tomorrow you may have to eat them... eat them raw!!
So… moral of the story is, whether you like it or not… being The-Girl-With-Super-Huge-Saggy-Rack, rocks!!!
Peace... Hugs & Kisses to friends and lover...
┌П┐ (•͡˘˛˘•͡)┌П┐ to all HATERS!!
Yours truly,
❉✿ FaRaH✿❉
(posted in my facebook in June 17th, 2012 at 10:15pm)
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